The reason you live a mediocre life
It’s all due to this ONE Syndrome.
I was in the Golf Court, trying for the 50th time of the day to hit the ball.
I kept failing no matter how much I try or how good I swing.
I felt like such a mediocre. Not exactly a loser, I still hit better than most people who just had their first golf session. But still, mediocre.
And then, I remembered. I was like that as well in my boxing sessions.
Just like that, I remembered all the stuff I was mediocre at. My work, my writing, my daily cycling, my diet, my dates, my instagram business, my youtube channel, my public speaking…
The list goes on.
I was good at starting, but I sucked at keeping up.
The shiny object Syndrome
According to wikipedia, it’s the situation where people focus undue attention on an idea that is new and trendy, yet drop this as soon as something new takes its place.
As a human being, we crave winning. This is not just a preference, it’s in our nature. To grow, to evolve, to seek meaning.
When we win, we feel validated. We feel like our life has purpose, it isn’t as dull as what we thought it was.
Game developers know this well, and utilize a human’s need for validation to develop their next big game.
The shiny object syndrome is natural. We want to win, and we want it NOW.
But because of this, we jump from one thing to the other in the hope that “this is finally it.” We don’t realize that the more we quit something to chase something else, the more it becomes a habit.
The real winners don’t go after the shiny object
One of the reasons we have the shiny object syndrome is our role models.
The real winners, those who have mastered the game we so want to win on.
Looking at Cristiano Ronaldo makes us want to be footballers.
Looking at Justin Bieber makes us want to be Pop Stars.
Looking at Scarlett Johansson makes us want to be movie stars.
But we don’t realize that how they are living today is actually a result of the work they have put in for years, maybe decades.
Cristiano Ronaldo don’t chase the goals, awards and fame. He chases being better at training daily.
Justin Bieber don’t chase his awards, followers and popularity. He chases bettering his music on a daily basis, every single day.
Scarlett Johansson don’t chase the awards, blockbusters and the money. She chases being a better actress every single day.
When we chase something shiny and realize the kind of boring work that had to be put in every day, we give up and chase something else more exciting. That’s our problem.
Boring is good
Do you realize that when you practice something so much that you become bored doing it, you’re actually getting good at it?
When I first practiced to drive a manual shift car, I was told to practice balancing the clutch and the brake for 1 week straight.
It was so boring, that there was no other way but for me to become good at it.
Think of something you do everyday, repetitively, that you become bored. The more you do it, the better you become at it right?
The problem is, most people look for the “excitement” and leave the boring.
You will have the chance to be excited later once you’ve mastered the boring basics.
Boring is good.
You have to be okay to suck
In the beginning, you will suck.
A lot of people watch movies or autobiographies of prodigies these days who shows the talent since they were very young, achieved the impossible at their first try and went on to create history.
Does that exist? Yes. But don’t rely on it.
You will suck in the beginning. It’s okay. We all do.
This is where most people quit.
But if you can go through that initial period of sh*ttiness and just continue to do it, you will eventually get better.
(Remember, you first sucked at walking or talking).
(Re)Define your wins, then stack small wins
If you want to be a writer, your win shouldn’t be have 10,000 readers on day one.
If you can’t achieve that win, you’ll consider yourself a loser and chase another shiny object.
Make your win Write one article a day and check it off your list.
Use apps like Habitory to maintain your checklist and track your progress.
Get better every day.
Consistency trumps Excitement
In the long run, you’re better off running 5 minutes a day for 30 days… than 30 Minutes a day only for 1 day.
Define your wins and stick with it. Don’t do more even if you think you can.
Save the excitement for tomorrow.
That’s how you make Winning a habit.
Don’t compare your page 1 with other’s page 35
I felt like crap in the golf course that day.
I looked around and saw these people hitting birdies and eagles (golf slangs) and I couldn’t even hit the ball right.
I didn’t realize most of them has been playing for years and decades.
Most of them sucked too when they first started playing. I asked them.
Don’t compare yourself. Your day will come.
The big wins is actually inevitable
I saw one interview Simon Sinek had with Tom Bilyeu and it inspired me.
“You can’t exactly pinpoint the time when your wife decided to fall in love with you. Rather, it was an accumulation of the small things you do to her on a regular basis.”
When you decide something, go through the initial period of sh*tiness and keep getting better as you go along, you can’t avoid the big win.
One day, your eyes will open and realize you are a good writer, you are finally in shape, that person loves you, you’re great at sales or even golf.
It doesn’t just happen. It accumulates.
Now, you will become someone else’s shiny object.
In conclusion
Jumping from one object to another is just our human nature seeking meaning.
A mediocre life is just a life not lived deep enough.
You will never truly live a meaningful life until you dive deep and be truly great at something. Be it business, sport or relationships.
Don’t be mediocre. Be great.
